Acts of Kindness

Anyone that knows me knows that I have been doing an extensive amount of reading on why and how some people are happier than others. This area of psychology has been termed positive psychology. Sonja Lyubomirsky is just one of the many authors I have read. She authored “The How of Happiness” and “The Myths of Happiness”.

Sonja has shared that we have the ability to control 40% of our happiness through certain activities. One of these activities is performing acts of kindness. In one of her studies, she created three groups of students: a placebo group that didn’t perform any acts of kindness, a group that performed 5 acts of kindness on Fridays and a group that performed 5 act of kindness during the week. The results were that performing acts of kindness raised the happiness level of the two groups that performed them, but that spreading them out over the course of the week had a greater effect. She did share that you can diminish the effect if it is planned too much or if you are looking for some reward for performing the act of kindness. i.e. if you are waiting for the thank you or acknowledgement

I recently performed an act of kindness that raised my happiness level. I am currently going through a divorce and I knew that I didn’t want to celebrate the New Year. It was that time of the year that we all renew our gym membership and I was having a dialogue with a young lady and the conversation on plans for the New Year popped up. She shared that her friends were trying to schedule an elaborate dinner, but that she was struggling for groceries and that the $100 a plate dinner they planned was excessive and that she was probably going to stay home. I worked out, but thought to myself that I was not going to do anything and maybe it would be a nice gesture to leave her some of the money I would normally spend. I placed $40 on her chair without her knowledge and left a note to have a Happy New Year.

I did workout the next day and she put two and two together and thanked me. I just told her she was welcome and to be safe. She is probably 3-5 years older than my daughter and I didn’t want to contribute to the delinquency of someone younger.

I share this story, because I was recently told that what I did was wrong. It was shared that others were laughing about my gesture and that they decided that I had ulterior motives. This couldn’t be further from the truth. I am not sure why people would make you feel bad about performing an act of kindness. I can only assume it has to do with their own inadequacies.

I share this story to bring about a couple lessons as it relates to acts of kindness. First, if you perform acts of kindness it will raise your happiness level. Second, don’t expect a thank you, an award, or any acknowledgement. Third, don’t allow others that criticize your gesture to affect you; only you know your intentions. Finally, the world would be a better place if we all looked for ways to perform an act of kindness daily.

Your Territory is Your Business – Start with a Goal

I started in sales 20 years ago at the beginning of 1996.  I am blessed and grateful for a career I wasn’t even sure about when I started.  I would recommend it to everyone, but the truth is that only a few will be successful just like the success rate among small businesses.  One of the main reasons is that the sales representative doesn’t understand the power behind setting a goal.

The Small Business Administration, in its informative frequently asked questions on small businesses, provides this answer on the survival rate of new businesses:

“About half of all new establishments survive five years or more and about one-third survive 10 years or more. As one would expect, the probability of survival increases with a firm’s age. Survival rates have changed little over time.”

I might argue that survival rates can change with successful sales people as the nature of sales has changed from managing current customers to new sales development.  I have always thought that selling doesn’t start until your prospect says “No.”  Be careful hiring someone with multiple P-clubs in the past as they may have been handed a goldmine customer base and just had to manage the incoming sales.  Mike Weinberg, in his book New Sales Simplified, suggests you change the title of those individuals from sales representative to customer service representative.  I am not saying that a portion of success comes from maintaining your territory, but like any business, the growth comes from obtaining new customers.  I evaluate a sales person by the percentage of new business they have obtained each year.  A “Going Out of Business Sales Strategy” is when you only manage your current customers while the margins decline each year because they demand a better price and you oblige.  A suggestion I have shared with struggling businesses is to change the sales compensation plan to reward new business at a higher rate than existing business.

I have worked with several sales organizations and I currently work with several sales organizations.  I thought I should share some of the wisdom, insight, and best practices I have obtained over time.  I will start by sharing with sales representatives that

“Their territory is their business and they should run it that way.”

Score provides a small business plan template.  I will make reference to this from time to time in this post series.

What is one of the first things a business should establish?  They should definitely decide on their product.  As a sales representative, you don’t have to do this.  A business should establish their mission and vision and this article in Inc Magazine provides a nice description that translates a vision and mission to goals and strategy.  As a sales representative, I would suggest you start with a SMART (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time-based) goal.

“If you can dream it, you can do it” – Walt Disney

There is a quick series of three five-minutes videos of Zig Ziglar speaking to an audience about goal setting.  He is funny and a great story teller.

Start today by setting a goal for your year.  Put it in the comments section and I will advise you on whether it is a SMART goal.  In an article in Forbes Magazine, it speaks to only 8% of people achieving their New Year’s resolutions.  I will next write about creating a plan to achieve your goal.

“A goal without a plan, is just a wish”

 

The Happiness Advantage

The Happiness Advantage is an excellent read with useful stories and case studies that demonstrate “Happiness fuels success” and not the other way around. Shawn Achor started researching and teaching sections at Harvard on this topic and has been able to isolate seven actionable, specific, and proven patterns that predict success and achievement.

You don’t have to be a Harvard graduate or instructor to recognize his first principle which is that we function better when we are happy over the neutral or negative mindset which is Principle #1. Shawn writes about priming. I think of the glass half-full versus the glass half-empty mindset. Start your day with a smile. Shawn mentions meditation, finding something to look forward to, committing an act of kindness, placing positivity in your surroundings, exercise, spend money, and finally exercise a signature strength. It is clear to me that each of these actions cause me to smile. It’s Mother’s Day and several of you may go out and buy flowers for your Mom, a card, or make a call. Think of the feeling you will have when completing this task as fuel or the “Happiness Advantage.”

Principle #2 is about the Archimedean Formula and the idea of the fulcrum and the lever. In summary, it speaks to moving our mindset which represents the fulcrum toward positive versus negative the two ends of the lever and our power is magnified. He explains that our reality is merely our relative understanding of the world based on where and how we are observing it.

Principle #3 speaks to the Tetris Effect or a pattern of thinking. Some people are so good at scanning for the negative they miss out on the positive; Shawn writes about a great study conducted that demonstrates the Tetris Effect. You can profit from three of the most important tools to develop a Positive Tetris Effect: happiness, gratitude and optimism. Its not about locking out the bad but concentrating on the good.

Principle #4 is referred to as Falling Up. This is a lesson I share with the sales representatives I have coached in the past. The first lesson is that you learn more from losing then you do from winning. The second is relative to tele-prospecting and is referred to the “No Quota” which is about the number of “No”s you will go through to get to the “Yes”. Each “No” is a step closer to “Yes”. It is about training your brain to move past failure and to see the opportunity in it.

Principle #5, Shawn refers as the Zorro Circle and yes it is based on the TV series. This is a lesson in goal setting and around limiting you focus. I was training some new sales representative last week and we spoke on the SMART goal methodology. You set goals that are Specific, Measureable, Attainable, Relevant and Time-Bound. To often we set goals that are out of reach and then lament over not reaching it. I like milestones which are steps in toward the goal because they provide more opportunities for achievement and they motivate you as you clear each step. Personally, I am trying to lose 40 pounds, but in the past I couldn’t get it done until recently as I have focused on 10 pounds at a time. I am closing in on 20 pounds over a 3 month span. The other idea that is expressed in a business principle called the internal locus of control. This is a belief that our actions have a direct effect on our outcomes versus thinking that daily events are dictated by external forces. The best sales people I have worked with always had a strong internal locus of control.

Principle #6 is around Shawn’s “20 Second Rule” which is about the power of habit. It starts with a story about him speaking to a group of executives and one of them referring to positive psychology as common sense. He learned afterward that the same executive was thought of as the most negative person in the office. The quote that I enjoy is, “Common Sense is not Common Action”. This chapter speaks to will power and creating a habit. The “20 Second Rule” has to do with activation energy. The part of this story I like is preparing to go work out in the morning. I have experienced this story in that my alarm will go off and I have to get up, put clothes on, sneakers and drive to the gym. To develop a habit easier it is best to lower the activation energy and in this instance you could do it by going to bed with your workout clothes on.

Principle #7 is about being socially invested. Shawn Anchor writes about how we are happier when we have the proper support in place. I will be writing a post on this as well, but it is about enabling people to work together which establishes bonds and support that can fuel their success. We are stronger as a group then we will ever be as an individual.

This is a book for every library. The research behind it is solid but more importantly it MAKES SENSE, so take action on how you can use positive psychology to fuel your success. Even more importantly, you will be happier!

Hello world!

Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!